To my Mirror

We've been in a "no contact situation" for so many years.

It feels awkward to write, and I know it feels worse trying to get back in touch!

A few years ago, I wanted to post this, exactly around the summer of 2020. Back then I came to the realization that my mother is a covert narcissist. The realization was traumatic, that I lost half the volume of my hair, and my gut health got worse to the point that I became intolerant to most foods, even fresh veggies! 

But, that learning about my mother made me realize a more important thing; you are my mirror!

A month after you decided to leave, I got a call from a friend who used to work with your father, may his soul rest in peace. And, that call helped me understand how complicated your relationship with your father is. I knew it was complicated, but I didn't know to what extent! Back then I asked God, why now?! He left, why do you give me this info now! I couldn't find an answer and I went on with my life. About a couple of years later your father passed, and I forgave him instantly, and prayed for him. I couldn't sleep that night. It was so hard for me knowing that you are in pain and I can't be by your side.

Well, more years passed and I realized that your complicated relationship with your father is only a mirror to the complicated relationship I have with my mother! I knew you are my mirror. I wanted to write, but I got sucked in the aftermath of that trauma, specially that my little girl was affected badly with the incident.

More years passed, a couple of months ago I knew that we were made this way, we were created to mirror each other's wounds...to trigger each other and go on separate journeys to heal these wounds, to become better people to help the world!

That's what we are, and what we will always be. Two mirrors in deep eternal love! Whether, we are together or apart, that's our reality.

I have no idea whether you will see this post or not, or when will you see it. But, I'm sure the best thing will happen in the perfect time. A month ago, I was inspired to write this, but, I had to face all weird technical problems you could think of! I thought I lost my blog. But, I knew that wasn't the right time, Well, I got my blog back so apparently this is the right time 😅!

Anyway, I will end this here.

I hope life is kind to you.

I will always believe in you...I will always love you.