On Monday, October 27, 2008
Different..Special...Unique...One of a Kind...and many other words I hear all the time. Words, used, by most people I get to know, describing me, as they believe!!
Lately, after passing through many experiences, I sat down, and thought!
What do these words really mean?!! Specially, that people who used these words to describe me, are the same people who let me pass through SPECIAL SHIT in my life!
What is it being special or unique? Is it something good, as all people think it is?! Or is it the worst thing that could happen to any person?? Why, if you are SO SPECIAL, why, should you be punished for that?!! Is it being special, the real special thing, that let you pass through special experiences?! Or, do the special experiences, make you special? Does being SPECIAL really exist?? Or, is everyone special in his own way, which will make all of us special in the end??!!!! Many questions I got, flowing in my mind, with no specific answers!
Well, before, I mean, before this thinking, I thought that I am special, as people believe, because, I use my intuition all the time, which I now believe, is not intuition at all!!! Now, I believe, it's being stupid, or being kind more than needed, which will lead to stupidity in the end!
Give him excuses, try to stand in his shoes. Look at the situation from his point of view, sure, he has his reasons.
Now, why am I using HE? Because, this intuition problem, appeared when it was a HE, NEVER when it was a SHE. And to be more specific, it appeared in the frame of relationship, not friendship, not for people I meet everyday, at work, in club, or anywhere else.
Here comes another question, is it really an intuition problem? Or, does it have to do with a heart vs. mind thing, knowing, that in most cases, I wasn't emotionally involved!!!
I just seem to give endless excuses, I never use my intuition!
Thinking again, I reach something that gives me relief: they are not special enough for me!!! They knew I was so special, but they are not!! That's why they couldn't deal with it!!! They didn't understand that being special, will lead to special treatment, that they will never find anywhere else!! So, they get the special treatment the wrong way. As if, they forgot how special I am! So, the problem starts!
This really feels better than believing that I am that stupid, giving chances and excuses to people who were never worth it!! Which will lead to the thought that I am not special at all, I am just special stupid, or special fool, or anything else that's not good at all!!!
Now, for those people who believe I am special, can you help me find a clue to this problem? As, it's causing me hard times!
And for those of you, I myself believe they are really special, and sure they heard that they are a couple of times, did you ever feel that being special is the same thing that causes you the misery of your life? Any suggestions you have to help me out?!!!
Different..Special...Unique...One of a Kind...and many other words I hear all the time. Words, used, by most people I get to know, describing me, as they believe!!
Lately, after passing through many experiences, I sat down, and thought!
What do these words really mean?!! Specially, that people who used these words to describe me, are the same people who let me pass through SPECIAL SHIT in my life!
What is it being special or unique? Is it something good, as all people think it is?! Or is it the worst thing that could happen to any person?? Why, if you are SO SPECIAL, why, should you be punished for that?!! Is it being special, the real special thing, that let you pass through special experiences?! Or, do the special experiences, make you special? Does being SPECIAL really exist?? Or, is everyone special in his own way, which will make all of us special in the end??!!!! Many questions I got, flowing in my mind, with no specific answers!
Well, before, I mean, before this thinking, I thought that I am special, as people believe, because, I use my intuition all the time, which I now believe, is not intuition at all!!! Now, I believe, it's being stupid, or being kind more than needed, which will lead to stupidity in the end!
Give him excuses, try to stand in his shoes. Look at the situation from his point of view, sure, he has his reasons.
Now, why am I using HE? Because, this intuition problem, appeared when it was a HE, NEVER when it was a SHE. And to be more specific, it appeared in the frame of relationship, not friendship, not for people I meet everyday, at work, in club, or anywhere else.
Here comes another question, is it really an intuition problem? Or, does it have to do with a heart vs. mind thing, knowing, that in most cases, I wasn't emotionally involved!!!
I just seem to give endless excuses, I never use my intuition!
Thinking again, I reach something that gives me relief: they are not special enough for me!!! They knew I was so special, but they are not!! That's why they couldn't deal with it!!! They didn't understand that being special, will lead to special treatment, that they will never find anywhere else!! So, they get the special treatment the wrong way. As if, they forgot how special I am! So, the problem starts!
This really feels better than believing that I am that stupid, giving chances and excuses to people who were never worth it!! Which will lead to the thought that I am not special at all, I am just special stupid, or special fool, or anything else that's not good at all!!!
Now, for those people who believe I am special, can you help me find a clue to this problem? As, it's causing me hard times!
And for those of you, I myself believe they are really special, and sure they heard that they are a couple of times, did you ever feel that being special is the same thing that causes you the misery of your life? Any suggestions you have to help me out?!!!
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